Boy does time fly...

I can't believe it was last July since I have been here! I don't even know how or if I can catch up on everything that has happened since then. Let's see, when I last posted, I was on my way to Missouri to take my parents on a vacation to Dad's home town and to Branson. I got to see my dear friend Mona from high school and she was sweet enough to watch my dogs while we continued on to Branson.

We traveled to Branson, found a hotel and started searching the show schedule. For those of you that have ever lived there (like me), going to a show is the last thing you would ever do. But now that I've been away for 13 years (geeze I can't believe I can say I have been out of college that long - ok, let's not speak of that again!), I don't mind the shows. Especially since it makes Dad happy. We went to the Dolly Parton's Dixie Stampede, Starlite Theater to see Moe Bandy, and we visited the Veterans Memorial Museum (which meant a lot to my Dad who is a veteran). After this, and many pit stops for food and souveniers, we were all ready to head back home.

When I got back home, the husband was soon coming home with a brand new dog; Apollo. Apollo, although a beautiful dog, and a super worker, did not make it as the new drug tracking dog on the unit. He had an amazing nose, but for some reason he was very scared and was overly cautious around people; which made it very hard to concentrate on his job. We all fell in love with him and it absolutely broke our hearts to have to send him back. I cried for 2 weeks and swore I would never fall in love with the next K9 brought into my house; I had learned my lesson the hard way. I have prayed that he is with a good family or good department, and it still breaks my heart to think of him. Here is sweet Apollo; oh how I still miss that sweet boy!

During this same time, Mom moved in with us, the husband was given another K9 dog (another story all together!), and I began more fertility testing! I think this is a good time for a break...to be continued with much more and more photos! I'm determined to catch up to the present tense by this weekend; I have so much to post! :)

Sisterly bond, how sweet it is!

Yes, I have a sister and I love her dearly. But she is not who my title refers to! Sorry Carol! :) I just have to brag on my girls for a minute. Three out of four came on the trip with me to Missouri: Trixie, Sadie and Boo. (Kakhi is on vacation with 'Cousin Hatch' on his farm and I'm sure is thanking God every day that she was able to miss the one way 8 hour drive!) So there we were, tooling along in my Mazda3 Hatchback with three dogs, three dog beds and a plethora of chew toys for their traveling enjoyment. Even though all three of girls love each other, I just had to share a glimpse into the "sisterly bond" between Sadie and Boo:

Is that not the most precious thing ever? It looks like I posed them, but honestly I didn't. I took these photos while I was driving! (Don't tell my husband!) I was being safe, really! I just happened to luck out with these "behind the seat shots"! Where was Trixie, you might ask? I'm not sure but she was probably soaking in a sun spot near the back window and lovin' life!

Introducing #5 ~ Apollo

Yes that's right, we have number 5! Well almost. The hubby is in North Carolina working with our newest ~ Apollo and will return on the 14th. Apollo is a Malinois and MALE!! Can we really bring a male dog into a female driven house? He will have to either take charge really quickly or admit defeat and accept who is really in charge of the yard! The hubby says he has really been trained well and loves to work (Apollo is a drug tracking dog). I've been told Apollo needs to add on a few pounds, but all in all he is a great dog with a laid back personality. He will make a great partner to my laid back husband!


I don't have a photo of him yet, but I wanted to show a photo of the breed of dog:

I just love this picture I found on the Internet (even though Apollo is not a K-9 dog) with the bullet proof vest. Just precious!

This dog was supposed to have a rough n' tough name (Chuck Norris) but thankfully the higher ups of the department nixed the name. Even though it is a fun name, I honestly can't see myself yelling 'Come here Chuck Norris!' for the next 10 years! I really like the name Apollo so I hope the guys decide to keep it! Stay tuned for the adventures to come! :)

Making a List and Checking it Twice

Yes that's right, I'm a list maker! And when I sit down to make a list it really gets me motivated. There is nothing like making a line through a completed task! Sick, I know. But seriously, I really thrive on my lists. Unfortunately, my list making has slowed down as of late and the tasks keep piling up. You know how it is, so much to do before a trip and you just know something isn't getting done. THAT'S when IT happens! Here are my recent "IT's":


1. The air conditioner goes out
2. The toilet handle breaks
3. The dishwasher is leaking
4. The dog needs a shot so she can get groomed (shaved) before heat exhaustion sets in
5. The church bulletin needs to be finished & printed 3 days early before I leave town
6. The garden is OUT OF CONTROL from the recent thundering rain showers (praise!)
7. Finish painting the bedroom before the hubby gets back in town
8. Find a route to Missouri through all the flooded roads
9. Four dogs need a bath


These are not typical items on my list mind you, but here they are just the same. Did I mention that I am supposed to leave for Missouri tomorrow by 11am (an 8 hour drive) and NONE of these items have been marked off my mental list? And what am I doing now? Writing on this blog!

Knowing Your Personal Strengths

Do you know your strengths? Let me preface by saying, I definitely know my weaknesses! I fret. I know, I know, I'm not supposed to fret, worry, stress and so on! We are supposed to give it ALL over to God. But boy is it hard to do when fretting seems to be coded within my DNA.

Let me give you an example; infertility. If you read my last post you know I have been struggling (once again) with infertility and the decision to (once again) come to grips with the big "I" word. Could it be PMS? Very likely! Could it be the recent announcements of pregnant women in my life (now up to 7!)? Quite possibly! Or could it be God working on me? Maybe! How can I know for sure? Hence the fretting.

As I struggle I try to bury it deep down so not to show my hurting or disappointments on the outside. It's much easier to deal with the outside world when you act as if you are the strongest person they know. But come on, who can really keep that kind of front going, for an extended period of time? For those who are closest to me, I might say something every once in a while to let you know I am having an "off day". Or, for those who are closest to me, you may never know; really just depends on me and my willingness to open up! I hope I'm not the only one who is like this! Geeze; sounds exhausting just re-reading it. Anyway...

After a very moving message at church and then going to the couple's baby shower yesterday, I really felt my fretting spiral out of control. I knew I had to confront my feeling with God and with my hubby and just get it all out on the table. Here is my struggle: Am I going against God's plan for me if I try infertility one more time? How do I know if all my feelings are not just "my feelings"? How can I tell if it isn't God's way of getting my attention or telling me that THIS time it will work? Am I hearing God or am I hearing my emotions? Aha...the root of the problem!

I must say, I have been so blessed with a husband who can see right through me and can get to the heart of my emotions immediately. He is so honest and really helps me see things more logically than my emotions would ever allow me to. And just like that, I am happy to say, the fretting is gone! Just like that, my prayers continue but with a lighter heart as this weight has been lifted from my shoulders. Just like that, I can rationalize and see things clearly again!

In the mean time, decisions will be made and life will go on; more to come on this. Besides, we have a new furry child that will make his way to our home in less than 3 weeks. That is another post all together...FIVE DOGS! Yikes!


~K

Doubts creeping back in

Well, it's happening again. Most of the time I am a very strong, focused, faithful woman who has come to accept everything I have been blessed with. That's not to say I don't have a bad day every once in a while. This time, I'm not even sure what started it. Oh wait, yes I am. As of last week I know of 5 women that are pregnant. Now don't get me wrong, I am very excited for them. And typically I wouldn't bat an eye at the news. But 5...in one week! Honestly, it broke my heart. This is the time that I stop myself dead in my tracks, pray to God and ask for forgiveness for having these feelings (and for basically feeling sorry for myself). It's during these times that I start to think, well, maybe I should go to one more doctor or have one more test done. Or maybe I should really try to open my heart up to adoption. All of which I have let go and moved on from for the past couple years. And all of which my wonderful husband would go through again if I just said the word.

I mean, who am I kidding. I'm 34. I work crazy hours (because I can), I have 4 dogs (soon to be 5) and a husband that loves me more than anything; in spite of not being able to give him a child. So why put myself through this yet again? I don't know. And honestly, I hope God can help me get past this soon; especially since I have a baby shower to go to this weekend for twins!

No matter what, I will keep praying, keep trusting in all of God's decisions and His grace. I was not meant to be a Mother, this much I have come to accept. But I still am 'Mom' to my 4 furry kids running around in the backyard and that is good enough for me! Better days ahead...

Grow, garden grow!

For the second year in a row we are trying our hand at gardening. We jumped right in last year, deciding to finally make use of the pre-made garden spot in our back yard. After working in the garden we realized the soil was great and should produce a great crop; even with two novices' behind the scenes. We planted corn, string beans, cucumbers, pumpkins and watermelon. Sounds great...right? It was!

Well, that was until the great drought of 2007 hit Georgia. With all the water restrictions (no watering lawns, flowers, washing cars, etc.) those with "food producing" gardens could still water to some extent. Even so, our poor garden dried up to an almost unrecognizable state. We eventually gave in and realized we had gotten all the goodness out of our gardening attempt that we were meant to get.

And with this year's crop growing quickly and abundantly both in the garden and in pots....

We are still lacking the one thing that the Midwest seems to be getting all too often this Spring/Summer season...RAIN! We water twice a day and are praying we can maintain our garden this year. With the addition of many varieties of peppers and tomatoes I need all the salsa recipes I can get! Happy gardening...